I’ve been quiet lately, well, when it comes to weddings anyways. My friend died last month - a victim of domestic violence….and I’ve been spending a lot of time thinking about it. I’ve been learning how an educated, powerful, beautiful, strong willed and fully capable women could fall victim to abuse in her own home.
My first reaction was shock, of course. Then I felt serious anger…I wanted to kick, and spit and yell. Then, I felt the need to do something to help - anything…become a victim’s advocate, start a boycott, donate a bunch of money. And lately, I’ve been reflective…on my own life. Thinking about the times I was manipulated or controlled by an old boyfriend.
I’ve also been avoiding my business. It’s difficult to get excited about place settings, and guest books after reading an article about domestic abuse…and how it affects 1 in 4 women. 1 in 4! I remember my friend’s wedding 12 years ago…it was at the Stanley Hotel in Estes Park. Katie was an amazing event planner, and everything was beautiful. So…now, here I am. Is it career suicide to talk about domestic violence as a wedding planner? Should I just keep waiting for the inspiration to come back? Or keep my business life and personal life separate? Or…can I use this platform to raise awareness? To do the important work.
I will remember what I love about weddings, and marriage, and helping to make everything beautiful, and easier, and sustainable…but for now, let me reach out and ask the important question…the hard one…the one that no average wedding planner will ask you…is your relationship healthy? Before we talk about colors, or napkins, or lighting…I ask you to please, read this article, and think about it. Let us not lose sight of what’s really important in our lives, and in our marriages.
Please, give me some feedback in the comments section - let me know you are with me on this!